Many of the writers I know, both independently published and traditionally published, spend a lot of time worrying about money, how to maximize profits, how much to spend on cover art, where their promo dollars will do the most good, how long it should take a royalty check to get from the publisher to their mail box…but I don’t worry about those things anymore.
I’ve decided I’ll just live off of all the winnings that are awarded through my e-mail spam box. In just one week alone, I’ve amassed a sizable fortune, apparently by doing nothing more than simply having an e-mail account.
*I inherited $10,0000 million from Mr. Jerry Utah – I don’t actually know Jerry, but apparently he likes me enough to have left me all his money.
*Chiso Age contacted me about the $10 million inheritance from Africa – apparently Chiso has been trying to reach me for a while, all that money has just been sitting around with no one to claim it.
*I won a $3.5 ATM card – Yeah. $3.5…three and a half bucks is a mere pittance, but perhaps I’ll invest it.
*The Malaysian government owes me $5 million – which I believe is more than the entire Malaysian government is worth.
*The Swiss Foundation has given me $6.5 million pounds – I suspect this is for my chocolate research.
My goal is to prove that chocolate really is the food of the Gods and with $6.5 million [pounds with a
dollar sign] I might be able to finish my research.
*The Federal Government of Nigeria says it owes me $1,500,000 – I suppose they lost a bet.
*Gareth and Catherine Bull [yes, as in ‘it’s all bull’] are sharing 1.5 million pounds of their Euro lottery
winnings with me. Considering they’ve never met me, I’d say that’s a tremendously kind gesture on
So, with all that loot, I’m not going to worry about selling books anymore. I’m just going to kick back
on my yacht and study chocolate. Maybe I’ll buy a bridge.
Have you won anything or inherited a fortune this week? I’m sure you have, just check your spam
Speaking of winning – I do not have a winner for this week’s ARC of AN AFFAIR IN APRIL yet. There’s
still time! Visit HERE for the details. No Bull.